By Catherine O.
Sex while pregnant can be a wonderful thing when your belly is growing, but it is not the same for every woman.
While my girlfriend was pregnant, she sometimes used her pregnancy as an excuse to not have sex—something I found it hard to believe. For me, sex while pregnant was an absolutely amazing experience that I will never forget—and something I never hesitate to talk about after two or three glasses of wine.
While expecting both of my children, I was dreadfully ill during the ﬁrst trimesters. Consequently, I was more concerned with keeping food down and keeping my head out of a toilet than having sex. I was also extremely tired. As I moved into the second trimester, I started feeling better. I became acutely aware of the changes occurring in my body. My breasts were becoming engorged and they felt heavy and more sensitive, but in a good way. All the extra blood ﬂow to my pelvic region made my genitals engorged as well. I was ready for sex at any and every moment. I was warm and moist. I felt myself bursting with so much life and sexual energy that I felt like I was Mother Earth. I needed to be worshiped…frequently!
Though my children have different fathers, I was lucky that both were willing to worship at my alter religiously and obediently. Some men are afraid that having sex will hurt the baby. Men, do not be afraid. You will not hurt your baby. A woman’s powerful body protects the baby with muscle tissue, amniotic ﬂuid, and a really great mucus plug that grows over the top of the cervix. (That sounds gross, but you won’t be touching it. So don’t worry about it.) The baby is well protected. Enjoy the mother carrying your child. Remember, after the baby comes, you will both be so tired that sex might not happen as much as you would like or maybe not at all for awhile. Seize the opportunity to enjoy one another.
I think I might have gone mad if I hadn’t had the fearless father in my bed. I was absolutely insatiable and orgasms were different. They were intense and glorious. As my uterus stretched to accommodate a growing baby, orgasms began to cause my uterus to contract. The pulse of my orgasms and the contraction of my uterus coming together were so strong it made me realize just how powerful my body was. I was creating a life within me, and I had a new awareness of my place in the natural cycle of life. I was high on hormones.
Sex was not the only insatiable appetite I had. I would cry about how fat I was getting while clutching a tub of ice cream and shoveling it all into my mouth. I needed my man to run out late-night for burritos, and more ice cream, and maybe a Cuban sandwich, and a steak with a loaded baked potato. I had heartburn until I gave birth.
Food was delicious, but sex? Sex was the best. It made my body feel better, it made feel emotionally grounded, and it made me feel powerful.
If you are pregnant and you have an appetite for sex, you should by no means be denied satisfaction by your man. Men, if you feel trepidatious about having sex with your pregnant goddess, do some research on the internet and go with her to a check-up and talk to the doctor. Ask questions. There is no need to be shy. Doctor’s know all about how babies are made. If, however, the doctor doesn’t ease your mind or fails to be supportive in any way, it might be time to ﬁnd a new doctor. A good doctor will tell you if and when you need to refrain from sex. As long as the pregnancy is going normally, sex is ﬁne and fabulous. If the doctor tells you to stop having sex, ask if that means to stop having intercourse, to stop having orgasms, or to stop having both. I was able to enjoy sex through the end of my pregnancy, but not without modiﬁcation of sexual positions.
Some positions just aren’t possible or safe after a certain point in a pregnancy. During the ﬁrst trimester, if momma feels like it, anything that feels comfortable for her is ﬁne. As the pregnancy progresses into the second trimester, and the pregnancy starts show more obviously, it is important for the man to keep his body weight off of the woman’s abdomen.
During the second trimester, I was easily able to climb on top and straddle my partner. Lying on your side with the man spooning behind the woman is a great way to keep pressure off the baby, as is doggy style. It is also safe during the second trimester for the woman to sit at the edge of the bed and lie back with her feet on the bed and knees in the air. The man can either sit or kneel at the end of the bed and enter her without putting pressure on the baby. As the belly grows larger it is very important that the woman not lie ﬂat on her back. This can cut off major blood vessel in the pelvic region and cause potentially serious problems. Using a Liberator Ramp to elevate to woman’s head in this position would be perfect.
Oral sex is ok during pregnancy, but it is very important to not blow any air into the vagina as this can cause air embolus, which is a bubble of air that gets trapped into the bloods circulatory system and can potentially be fatal if it travels to the lung.
Whatever sexual adventures you choose during your pregnancy, it is important to communicate with each other about what is comfortable both emotionally and physically for both participants, but most of all the mother. Men, always help your goddess by supporting her body weight while getting into sexual positions. No one wants an injury that could put momma or baby at the risk of getting hurt. If intercourse is uncomfortable, ﬁnd other ways to pleasure each other. If something hurts the woman, stop doing it at once. If contractions don’t stop shortly after an orgasm, call your doctor immediately. Be smart and supportive. Most importantly, enjoy the journey into parenthood.0