Asked by you, answered by Ava

Everyone’s love life deserves a second opinion. Ava is here to answer questions about Liberator products, your sex life, or sex in general. Curious about the best sex positions for a bad back? Wondering how to fit your playtime into a busy schedule? Trying to find the perfect toy to surprise your spouse with? Ava is here to help.

Email your question to askava@liberator.com.  And don’t worry—your secret is safe with her. We will not reveal your name or contact information at any point.

So ask away! No question is too small or too far out!

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Ask Ava

My girlfriend and I broke up a few month’s ago after a long relationship. Now that I don’t feel like hiding a rock anymore, it’s time to get back into the dating pool. But I’m worried that when I finally meet that special someone I won’t be able to perform as well sexually and wind up being huge flop. It makes me anxious just thinking about coming too soon or not having enough strength to keep up. I want to impress the ladies not turn them off. What suggestions do you have for building my sexual stamina while still single?

I think everyone worries about being a dynamo in the sex department. For many—especially the penis-carriers among us—the inability to offer up an all-night-waking-the-neighbors-fest of sexual ecstasy creates tons anxiety and concern. I blame movies, which paint a pretty picture because they are fantasies, not reality. But trust me, although your lady friends probably will not mind being thrown up against a wall and banged into blissful oblivion, it is hardly necessary. I am willing to bet that if you try a few of the following steps, you’ll be on the right path to ensuring satisfaction for both of you.

Don’t Panic

77995637They say sex starts in the mind, so it is imperative to go into this will a clean slate, free of worry. Allow yourself to stay focused in the bedroom by doing some light meditation beforehand. Slip into the bathroom and take a few deep breaths. You’d be amazed at how centered you will become, even just taking a few moments for your peace of mind beforehand. You can also practice in your alone time before the big date. Start by setting a timer for just one minute and continue daily until you reach a point where you can gain focus easily. When it finally comes time to get it on, you’ll feel more engaged with the hot woman in front of you and less with your own preoccupations.

182190564Let’s Get Physical 

Sex just isn’t about getting pleasure—it’s more about giving pleasure. In order to do that, you’ll need to maintain your strength. Like any physical activity, your stamina in bed can be improved by staying fit. Regular exercise, especially aerobic, will keep you healthy, promote good blood flow and give you the energy to have great sex. And when you start moving, it is easier to stay moving. You’ll have more energy to dedicate to hour long oral sessions or whatever your lady may be in the mood for. Plus exercise can improve your body image and make you a more confident lover.

Love Thyself

175139660We all know masturbation does not cause blindness, but it does open your eyes to your inner Don Juan. When done properly, masturbation can train your body to respond to certain kinds of stimulation—and I’m not talking about whacking your junk for 2 minutes until you’re satisfied. Take your time to explore what makes you feel good. For instance, challenge yourself to see how long you can last, or better yet, switch up your routine to include prostate massagers and different kinds of lubes. Practice edging techniques to keep yourself from the brink and know when to pull back. After all sex is a marathon, not a sprint.

Undress Rehearsal

As with any activity, practice makes perfect. Just because you’re single doesn’t mean you don’t get to rehearse. One of the best ways to increase your stamina, strength, and control is to practice new sexual positions with the Liberator Fleshlight Mounts. To enhance your thrusting capabilities, you may want to consider a doggy-style Shape like the Fleshlight Top Dog Mount. If balance and agility are something you want to improve, the Fleshlight Two Play Mount offers just the right hands-free height. Show off your slow moves and perfect your missionary style skills by introducing the Fleshlight On a Mission. With these Shapes, not only will you be able to build stamina, you’ll also be able to practice new exciting positions that your previous partner probably refused to try. Plus, they can also be used during sex with your new partner.

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82143898New skills breed confidence, and confidence makes the ladies come back for more. By varying your techniques, you’ll begin to notice that your stamina and climax control will improve over time. But engaging in intercourse is not the the be-all and end-all of sex. You can impress your new partner by taking time with foreplay. Kissing, touching, dirty talk and the use of toys can take the pressure off of you to perform and make it a memorable for her. When you make the most of the skills in your sexual toolbox, everyone walks away with a smile on their face.

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